This weekend has been a memorable one, but one I would like to forget. I am feeling sooooo much better physically. My back is still feeling like I'm having back labor, probably from the medicine they give me to make my uterus contract. I will be calling the doctor in a minute to see if there is anything I can do to make it feel better. Now, if I could lasso my emotions, then we'd all be good. Randy's having a hard time with emotions also. I figure it's because he doesn't have the physical pain, like I do, to detract from the emotional stuff. I like that my husband is a sensitive person, but it is a double edged sword in situations like this.
We have been so blessed with so much support from family, friends and neighbors. Our neighbors, the Rindlisbacher's, have been through some of the hardest times I can ever imagine and the other night they brought a basket of goodies over. In that basket is a book called Tear Soup, A Recipe For Healing by Pat Schwiebert and Chuck DeKlyen. It was exactly what I needed to read. It is a book about sympathy and compassion. It is really great for anyone dealing with any kind of loss. It's in kid book format, so, it's a super easy read. I would recommend it to anyone having a hard time right now.
I am trying to get a handle on the emotional side of things. I know that everything happens for a reason and that it's a bonus that we know now that we can get pregnant, but the emptiness I am feeling is still hard to deal with. One thing that is really tearing me up is the lack of care from certain key people. People that I have been there for so many times, people that I expect to be there to hold me up and show support are all of a sudden..... GONE. Are they going through something big that I don't know about that would explain their absence? Do they not know what to say? I think a call or even acknowledging what has gone on would be sufficient. I don't understand and I'm afraid when they finally do pull their heads out of their butts, I'm not going to be nice. I need to figure out how to not let it affect me. It's not to discount how much love and compassion has been shown to us, but there are some family members and those that we are super close to that are killing me by not recognizing our pain. Am I being a pouty pants about it? Yes. Do I wish I could just forget about it? Yes. Until then, I will blog my feelings and hopefully get feeling better about it. My sweet friend sent me a link to a blog about what to say when your loved ones are struggling. THIS BLOG tells some things that are appropriate to say in these situations when you don't know what else to say. Thanks for that link!!!
Anyhow, I'm rambling now. Overall, I think we're on the mend. We have to wait for me to have one period and then we'll be back in the baby making business again!!!! We can handle that part!!! So, again, THANK YOU for the support and encouragement. I feel like there are angels all around me, helping when I feel like I am totally in the dark. I appreciate every one's love, support and compassion so much.
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